Welcome to your second gift of December which is all about the gift of humanity. Did you know that how you form relationships throughout life is based on your experiences with your carers and environment from pre-birth to eighteen months old?
That is completely mind-blowing is it not?
That before we fully understand we are a separate person from our primary carer we have stored mental representations or schemas that form our attachment to people throughout the rest of our life in our limbic system.
I will cover attachment and the importance of it in 2023. There will be lots of information that will both make sense and be a WOW moment to you. I do not want to spoil anything, but literally understanding how we form relationships is a life changer.
Connection is huge to me. The necessity of connection is a subject that I constantly remind people of, and in essence, was a huge drive for me setting up this substack writing. The urge to connect to a tribe, the primal instinct that leads us all to want to part of a group. Part of something that holds value, meaning and fellowship.
So your second gift of December comprises of these ‘Just Three Things’ to inspire the ‘Joy in Connection’.
Connect with your senses
Blend the following oils to create your own scent of joy
lemon, lavender, orange, bergamot and rose.
You can burn it, rub the blend in your hands to warm and then breathe it, put a few drops in the bath, put a few drops on your pulse point. Anything goes. This blend will help your brain connect with both you and your surroundings. A lovely joyful connection.
Connect with yourself
The workbook that I have prepared for you is beautiful to me. It has a bit of everything that you need to have ‘joy in connection’. I intend you enJOY it. I enJOYED writing it especially for all of you need it. You can download it from HERE.
Connect with others
For many people they are filled with fear and anxiety about human connection as much as they yearn for being part of something or important to someone. So for the final part of your ‘just three things’ could you just consider what you can do to connect with an other or others. Could you smile and wish someone well? Could you place your hand on theirs? Could you tell that barista how much you appreciate their knowing how you like your coffee? Anything is a start. It can be as small or large a gesture as you wish. The magic is that when you start that it becomes easier. Oxytocin (our bonding hormone) is on a positive feedback loop so the more we do human things the more human we are.
“Sometimes, reaching out and taking someone's hand is the beginning of a journey.
At other times, it is allowing another to take yours.”
Both practical and beautiful. Sometimes it feels we are in a world where competition is valued more than connection - social media formed to supposedly build connection (and in many cases it does - massively) but instead encourages competition for attention- somehow warping our natural instinct for connection, replacing it with a craving for an instant dopamine hit provided by likes and followers? Maybe?