Why I decided to remove my children from school

Authenticity is important

I have been troubled by the education system for a while. It has always had its bad and ugly points but they were balanced in part by the good.

I am a lover of education in its truest form.

I have thrown myself into all aspects of learning, wisdom and knowledge all my life and do not see myself not being a learner, ever.

I have a teaching qualification (PGCE secondary science - biology) as well as experience of working within the school system.

I am also a doctor of cognitive neuroscience.

Neuroscience is the science of the brain and the nervous system.

Our brains are complicated.

To understand this complexity, there are many types of neuroscience. Neuroscientists study how brain cells signal to each other, for example which chemicals they use; they study how brain cells connect to each other, for example by sending small electrical pulses; and they study whole systems of brain cells at work, for example looking at connected activity in the visual areas of the brain, the auditory areas of the brain and the thinking areas of the brain.

Neuroscientists also study how the brain evolved, how cells in the developing brain differentiate themselves into, say, visual versus auditory brain cells, and how brain cells know where in the brain to go in order to do their designated jobs.

The kind of neuroscience that is perhaps most relevant to me is that of cognitive neuroscience. Cognitive neuroscientists are interested in what happens in the brain when we have emotions, or thoughts, or when we create anything or when we read and write. When ever we interact with anything realy.

Any one of these human abilities and skills is an incredibly complex topic of study, yet incredibly rewarding.

How can a person create a new poem or paint an image that has never been seen before? Multiple brain mechanisms are involved, and individual differences in neurochemicals can also play a role. For example, some of the most creative artists have been quite unhappy people, and the link between creativity and mood disorders is an intriguing topic in neuroscience.

Cognitive neuroscientists also study these questions developmentally. Before you can write a great novel, you need to learn to read and write, and to read and write, you need to learn to speak. How do babies learn language and how do children learn to read? These are questions studied by developmental cognitive neuroscientists.

So – all the things that make human beings human are topics of study in neuroscience.

My area of expertise is atypicality within the central nervous system, particularly neurodiversity and the study of effects of trauma on life outcomes. I wrote the world’s first theory of wellbeing for adults with autism spectrum condition with my passion and vision being that I want to create a better (and kinder) world, one brain at a time.

A huge part of neuroscience is about how we interact with the environment. We know that the development of the brain and how well it functions is because of the richness (or not) of the stimuli in the environment as well as the quality of the relationships (or not) that we have with other humans within that environment.

This interaction with the environment has been the biggest driver of my need to remove my children from the education system as is.

My children do not have labels or anything to depict them needing extra support, they do not have emotional distress. I am not a conspiracy theorist in the way depicted by mainstream media who are highlighting the growing numbers of homeschooled children by these groupings and demographics.

Quite simply, the education system was bringing out the worst in my children. When really, schools should be focused on bringing out the best.

If any parent is reading this you need to be concerned about practices within the school system that are seemingly commonplace.

There is a one size fits all approach to many challenges with the lowest common denominator being the bench mark for policy and procedures.

There is little room for discussion or debate and if you have any constructive remarks about the system then it retaliates with verocity and unkindness.

It encourages mediocrity not excellence.

It wants conformity not agency.

There is a huge focus on the labels of mental health, yet no desire to curb any of the factors that may be causing distress.

The curriculum is narrow and not engaging, which arguably is not the fault of the schools themselves, but I have not seen any teachers or their union representatives striking for this reason. Strikes tend to be about terms, conditions and salaries of teachers.

The education system is not funded or managed with the intended end result of a fully functioning, well, happy, autonomous human being.

It is unsurprising that over 50% of undergraduate students (60% in the USA) say they have a mental health condition. This is on the back of a childhood that can be for many not conducive to healthy outcomes.

As a parent and a neuroscientist who has three children, arguably of two different generations, I can disclose this - my worries for my eldest were around have I chosen the right school for her academic ability? Will she thrive, will she be able to access the right opportunities to support her in her chosen career?

For my younger two my worries are these - are their schools safe? are the adults in their schools sensible and trustworthy? How is their wellbeing? Do I need to challenge any dogma or doctrine that they are given as part of the PHSE curriculum? How will they deal with being in a very small minority of children without smart technology as I know how BAD it is for their growing brain.

I am no longer even thinking about academic achievement, I am looking at their health, wellbeing and ability to grow.

When I decided ultimately to withdraw them from the system I felt bereft. I still feel bereft. I am grieving, I feel a keen sense of loss. I also feel for my children. We are so conditioned that this is the right thing to do for them - sending them to school - that we have lost sight of what is right for them.

In the United Kingdom, children’s rights are safeguarded by the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child (UNCRC).

Comprehensive Coverage: The UNCRC is the most complete statement of children’s rights ever produced. It encompasses 54 articles that address various aspects of a child’s life, including civil, political, economic, social, and cultural rights. These rights apply to all children, without discrimination based on race, colour, sex, language, religion, opinion, origin, disability, birth, or status^.

Equal Importance: No right within the Convention is considered more important than another. Whether it’s the right to relax and play (Article 31), freedom of expression (Article 13), safety from violence (Article 19), or access to education (Article 28), each holds equal significance.

General Principles:

• Non-discrimination (Article 2): Every child has rights without any form of discrimination.

• Best interest of the child (Article 3): Decisions affecting children must prioritise their well-being.

• Right to life, survival, and development (Article 6): Children have the right to life and healthy development.

• Right to be heard (Article 12): Children’s views should be respected and considered in matters affecting them.

I could not hand on heart truly believe that the general principles were being met for my children, and I knew that they were not growing and developing in the best manner for them especially around their wellbeing.

So this is my rebuttle to the countless articles that vilify and denegrate parents who make the decision to remove their children from the school system.

Children need play, rest, stimulation, boredom, good nutrition, hydration, challenges, good role models. loving, caring relationships and nothing that will damage their central nervous system growth.

They need a predictable, safe environment with boundaries that are consistent, fair and stimuli that is age appropriate.

Above all children need to be able to shown and therefore develop healthy schemas (blueprints) on how to navigate and succeed at creating their best life.

They need to be curious, explore, be courageous, learn how to be regulated, understand their place in their environment, and, feel free to ask questions and get things wrong.

They need other children, they need to socialise and this was one of the key issues that kept me in the system as I know how important this is. Human beings need human beings. Children need Children. This is a huge focus for me going forward, finding children who are still children and not those who are damaged by an increasingly toxic environment.

Like thousands of other parents I have taken the step to de-condition and re-educate both myself and my children. I did not take this step lightly. It was with the heaviest of hearts, but I know that environment is everything and the school environment was simply not good enough.

“Leaders are not, as we are often led to think, people who go along with huge crowds following them. Leaders are people who go their own way without caring, or even looking to see, whether anyone is following them. "Leadership qualities" are not the qualities that enable people to attract followers, but those that enable them to do without them. They include, at the very least, courage, endurance, patience, humour, flexibility, resourcefulness, stubbornness, a keen sense of reality, and the ability to keep a cool and clear head, even when things are going badly. True leaders, in short, do not make people into followers, but into other leaders.”