Why fairness is a big thing to me
especially when reading opinion pieces...
One of my areas of self-punishment that I return to over and over again, despite attempting to abstain is reading opinion pieces.
I do it, to see what zeitgeist is being cascaded to the masses, and often marvel at the narrative repeated over and over again, by different people, who have, it seems, been tasked with delivering the same message, in differing ways, just to be sure that the majority have ‘got it’.
I have thought to write about this to you, as have been thinking a lot in the past few days about the efficacy of story telling.
It is an amazing ability we have as human beings.
The neural mechanisms that allow us to mirror in our brains (and therefore experience) what someone else is describing or telling us in their communication.
It is one of my favourite human facts.
We evolved to be prime species of humans (at a time there were about 11 or 12 perspective candidates) because of the ability of our brains to believe in something that is or was not real.
How amazing is that?
Now back to my story today.
I am attempting to abstain (miserably failing) from reading opinion pieces, because, I am always compelled to put my opinion on that opinion in the comment boxes below.
And guess what?
My opinion is often deleted.
It is often termed as ‘this comment removed by a moderator because it didn’t abide by our community standards.’
Another punishment I dole out to myself is this - trying to find out what the community standards are.
They are elusive, and no-one every can tell you exactly why you have not abided by them.
My brain, well my whole central nervous system, is immersed in fairness.
Life is increasingly unfair and inequitable, however, my central nervous system does not like that status quo, so it revolts strongly to any percieved unfairness.
Opinion pieces that stir up lively discussion with other people’s opinion are by very definition a place where people can meet, much as in ancient times, to be stirred up, to have their emotions alerted, to be given information or data that needs to be remembered and to be able to have the two way discussion that results in real human connection.
To be deleted, not because you have been insulting, or hateful, or just plain mean is not how human beings evolved.
Our intelligence, our ability, our enlightment evolves through curiousity, discussion, application and listening to other stories, not just our own.
I cannot tell you how many times I have been deleted. It is definitely double figures. I also cannot tell you why I have been deleted. I can only surmise that my opinion differs to the opinion of the opinion writer and therefore cannot be allowed to be there.
I can tell you that I act respectfully, with carefully considered empirical evidence to form my opinions and pride myself on the language beign used, chosen ever so thoughtfully to convey my opinion in the manner in which I intend it.
Fairness is all about that.
We do not have to agree about anything.
We need to be fair in that disagreement.
If your opinion gets air time, and mine is not hateful or derogatory then why does mine not?
Fairness means that journalists covering a story must remember there are usually two sides—and often more—to most issues and that those differing viewpoints should be given roughly equal space in any news story.
If we just give one side and do not allow any others, then what do you think happens within our brains?
We have such a biased viewpoint that any other opinion becomes a life and death, survival issue for our central nervous system.
It becomes impossible for people to consider a different way, an alternative view, muliple solutions to challenges and problems.
This is why fairness matters.
In terms of our neuropsychology and biology it is huge for our growth and development.
In respect of our social environment it is necessary so that we feel valued, belonging and meaning, regardless of whether people agree or not.
Moving in a singular, myopic way is bad for the soul, bad for the brain and bad for our connections.
Despite being urged to by many friends, I do not think that I can ever stop my urge to respond to opinions, even when I get cancelled.
I consider it my moral and ethical duty.
To refuse to be me, who is eminently fair, even when the environment is really pitching severely in the direction of unfairness.
“The world isn't fair, Calvin."
"I know Dad, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favour?”
It is a lonely task at times.. however I have determined to give myself 20 minutes a day to get cancelled :-)
Thank you for your fair post! In my personal development quest, I promised and it took me some time to hold myself and not always sharing opinion, answering or arguing with people ( live or especially on social media) as an act of accepting others, leave them be as they are. It proved to be healing for me. I guess that may be in near future I will find the right balance for me - when to speak up, and when to let it go!